Saturday, 26 January 2013

I'm from here, actually ( or how to feel good in your own country)

I LOVE being french as long as I'm the only french around........

It's so cool to be French. You can be called arrogant, always angry, greedy with food .  you don't care, you don't have to fucking live there!

But when you do, you realise how fucking true it all is.

I can t watch the news without being angry and ask more angry people why others are so angry..... They still fight about Sarkozy ( did anyone tell them he was gone or I became as good as the Brits in politics)
Why do you have to drink wine with every meal ( and close down all the shops for lunch time)
I’m still recovering from the frogs and snails I had for Xmas. Why eat that????

And why am I asking all those questions since I’m supposed to be ONE OF THEM?

Citizen of the world it is!

The thing is.... I don't see the point of being french in my own country. ( same as I still don't understand why you need to marry someone from your own country, when you don't actually need a visa to stay in that country ? Why make your life so complicated??? )

Plus , my “Made in France” tattoo does not make me sexy here, it makes me bloody nationalist.

Why did I come back to live here again?

Ze book. Yes, I wrote a book . A small step for humanity a huge one for blondes. Of course in French ( the English one should follow)

The material proof of my travels. A book. Written by me. Oh so proud.

But still the most asked question when you live in your Home town is “ So , are you still NOT married?”

Then you learn to be humble .

God knows that book made me travel already.

I wrote it in 5 different countries around the world, including a Thai monastery with one power point to plug in my lap top ( next to Buddha) . To make the money to publish it I went through various jobs ( all lost to this day)  and starvation ( but I'm still a D cup I don't know how to explain that one)
Now I've got to face my own country  ( forget starvation) , to sell it  ONE BY ONE since we’re not in book shops.

If I don't make it as a writer, you can write '' at least she tried'' on my grave.

My goal is to sell the first 200 and then do what I do best. GO TRAVELING.
(I started Mid November , I sold more than half already. No I did not give ANY for free. I’m a big girl now. Maybe I swapped one for a taxi ride to the airport once but... It does not count...right?  )

I was having a hard time fitting into my own country when I saw the blog of an Aussie girl I met in England who is currently living in France.

Hilarious . She 's living life to the fullest enjoying croissants, Christmas markets, mulled wine, chatting to random french people, discovering she had a liver ( France is the only country where I can actually feel my liver)  .... Exactly the way I would do it, ANYWHERE ELSE in the world. In the mean time I’m crying like a baby watching Sydney NYE fireworks on TV ( I was there last year.....) . Imagine me on Australia Day ( shit, it’s today)

Life is fun when you're traveling huh. ( nostalgy)

Hang on, this girl is in the SAME country as me! But for me, it’s the country of serious, fitting in and play by the rules. Knowing me...... I wonder how I managed to live  here the last 2 months and a half...... And still have no fake boyfriend , no house in the countryside and no prestigious job that people would admire me for.

No, this time, I’m being strong(er) But I stopped traveling ....

When do you know when you stop traveling?

Your attitude changes, mate.

When you look at it, I haven't changed much :

-I'm still talking, writing about traveling and changing the world.

- I still take pictures of random stuff and chat to random people ( a woman asked me what she should get her dog for Xmas the other day. I answered love)

-My backpack is still half full in a corner of my room, I own 2 pairs of jeans, 1 jumper, several tops and 3 pairs of shoes ( thank you Lumi and English second hand shops)

- People keep asking me “ How long are you staying with us for?”

-I have no money

CONCLUSION : I 'm still traveling !!!

I’m just traveling in my own country for a while.

Obviously when you start changing your attitude, your life starts to change too.

Selling my book led me to a girl's place for afternoon coffee. We had met a few hours at a boring meeting for English teachers back in the years.
We started to randomly speak English so her 2 year old son would pick up.

Oh so cool to talk about private things in a supermarket without anyone understanding much of anything you're saying. (Only in France can you speak English so privately...)

Gradually I felt like I was backpacking again... in my home town.

The news slowly stopped to annoy me. Why? I stopped watching  !

I started to fascinate several people with this weird life of mine. (You ve got to accept being weird first) . I usually accept it in the rest of the world so why not here.

Anyway , when people read the book with all my fuck ups , the will know who I am ( and even how many guys I had in my life in a year)

I sell books to ladies  at my gym classes , at the English Club I go to.

I know they read the book when , the following week I go back and all they say is “You” ..... and laugh.

It’s ok to sit with strangers who know your whole life actually ( when you do love your life)

“ So where are you from?” tells me the hot guy on the other end of the table at the English Club the other night.
I felt like I was backpacking in Asia again so I surprised myself answering :

“ I’m from here , actually” I had never said that in English before. We all knew where Vesoul , my home town was because we were almost all from here !  So proud. Until the next question .

“ Where do you live ?”


“Couch surfing at my parents” seemed the coolest idea.

Not so good eventually.

But I was myself.  It’s so cool to be yourself AND be from “ here” ( big first time for me!)

So the best way to feel good when you stop traveling is....... to keep traveling anyway.

Who can stop you other than yourself anyway? 

PS :Watch how awesome  your own country looks through your eyes of citizen of the world? 

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