Wednesday, 28 September 2011


'' Have you been here before?'' says the new german intern of Kipps Canterbury as I was making myself a cup of coffee in the kitchen the other day. I needed a break from Kipps Brighton. Kipps Canterbury is the next best thing for a short break.

Haha. Where do I start?

The week I spent here by mistake in 2005? Or the year that I lived here after that? Or maybe when I left my fiance with all my furniture to come back and live here in a cupboard in 2008?

Kipps Canterbury...

'' Yeah I stayed here for a bit'' I told her not wanting to sound overly dramatic like '' my whole life started here'' ( + tears )

But yeah. My whole life started here ( try not to cry Annabelle , you just met her 10 seconds ago )

'' You must have so many good stories about this place '' She says.

Hell yeah. Do you have 3 hours? I can tell you all about it.

She did not.

Obviously I had to pick one. When I checked in a drunk / disabled / homeless guy ? ( all at once. I scored that day) Or the crazy ''citizens of the world'' guests ? the Love Tent maybe ? ( No I can't decently tell her about the Love Tent , I JUST met her. Way to early.) Me winning a drinking game on Halloween 2008? ( and sleeping in the toilet thinking it was my cupboard , sorry my bedroom )

I picked the only story that is passed on from Kipps generation to Kipps generation.

THE ghost.

Don't freak out she's only a little girl. She lives on the top floor of the building ( near my cupboard) . She has not paid her rent in 200 years ( cheeky) and she sometimes plays tricks on people, just for a laugh. you know like shuting doors , turn TV off ( she hates big brother. Good girl.)

One of our german interns got so freaked out one day that he apparently prefered to spend his night at the bus station. Number of beers he had that night still unknown .

As I was talking about that with a great Kipps passion , I started to feel them. The other ghosts. The alive ones. You know people who used to live here before but who are now gone. People WHO HAVE MOVED ON.

No they were not there anymore. You know all these people I used to live with , people I used to love. It's crazy how you expect to see them when you walk in.

No mate they're not here anymore. Now they've gone. Finished. Over. End of.


So I spent the rest of the morning walking around the hostel aimlessly with my now infamous '' I can see dead people'' face.

'' Sorry I'm going to be a little weird for a bit'' I say to my best friend.
'' You've been weird for 3 years, I'm used to it''

I had to go do something about it.

Retail therapy . That's what I used to do before. to feel better.

What do I do now? Just therapy.

First I went and buy some crystals in a ''witch shop''.
Then I went for a body detox.
I probably was in a sort of trance when I decided to do it because I suddenly woke up to the voice of a lady telling me '' you are now detoxing your kidneys'' in a heavy greek accent. With my feet in hot water feeling some electo magnetic charge through my whole body.

Then I decided to hang out in a book shop staring at book covers sitting next to a guy with dreadlocks who was reading '' witchcraft for beginners'' . I finally decided to buy the one called '' The art of happily going nowhere''
It basically says that no one has no clue where we're going so we might as well go there without dragging the burden of our past with you.

A spiritual version of Ghostbuster.

Who ya gonna call?

Damn , I ve got the music in my head now.

You think that'll be enough to kill my ghosts from the past . No. When I got back to Kipps they were still there.

You know that feeling you have sometimes. The '' I should have spent more time with people I love'' (understand ''I should not have fucked it all up'' )

Who ya gonna call?

There were still some people ''from the past'' hanging about. And that was good to see them. 2 of them are staff. The other one is Luigi.

Luigi : half human half italian. He was sold with the place a few years ago, has been living in the hostel for about 8 years . Age unknown ( about 45 + 8 now) but we know the age of the girls he fancies ( half his )

One thing I did NOT want to talk about was the past. Not good for my ghost syndrom.
'' Remember when....? ''

Shall I go for another detox NOW or do I have wait until tomorrow to go for a brain detox ( in a greek accent)

Who you're gonna call?

A pint of beer with a friend I have not seen in a while.

Okay let's do that.

It was good to see him (and his ghosts)

The best thing we found to get rid of our ghosts was to actually TALK about them. It's like vampires and daylight . It even gets better when you have a good laugh about them.

So We decided to have a competition . Who had the most pathetic love life.

'' I usually stay friends with my exes he says. Except for the dead one'' he says.

He won. But that was close.

'' Maybe we should go on a date together'' he says after 2 pints.



What, you're actually SERIOUS???

He's obviously 1/ NOT over 60. 2/ straight 3/ never read my blog.

'' Maybe not .... because hum... this week end... '' I say .


Bloody French women......

Who ya gonna call?

It was time to go back to Brighton. Home. Where ghosts are still alive. and walking up my street off their face.

I get off the train : 125 cops trying to stop 1 drunk guy from boarding a train.

Who ya gonna call?

I hope they caught him before he got to London

I decided to go and see Mister Dynamite before going home . He told me about this complicated English guy. Yeah he texted back.

But dude, he is SO weird. Like REALLY strange.

I got to wonder what weird REALLY meant when the girls who were watching football with a beer stood up and shouted ''yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaah'' as their team scored, while boys were quietly listening to Chritina Perri's last love song in the bar area.

'' I've got a date with a Brit this week end'' I tell him proudly.
He gave me the " Why are you doing this to yourself'' sort of look.

Because if we are to create new ghosts , they might as well have a good sense of humour.

Who ya gonna call?

(Let me know how long that damn song stayed in your head today. Just curious)

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